It's A Mens World" by Bebang Siy

Publisher: Anvil
Publishing Year: 2011


                                                           Of Men, Mens, and Women
                                                  A review by Glea Mae Tobes I-BS CDE

A woman of the present time is probably more candid and outspoken when it comes to sharing her own encounters and experiences in the society. Author Bebang Siy in her book It’s A Mens World gives us a look at her own experiences from being an innocent child to a woman, and as a Filipina-Chinese. In a humorous and sarcastic tone, she talks of her first menstruation period, friendships, dating, and an untimely pregnancy. The author’s humor is evident throughout the book, and the essays are laced with reflections about life.

 In her opening essay of the same title, the author tells how a girl’s first menstrual period could turn her life around as it marks her womanhood.  She recalled how envious she was of her younger sister who had her menstrual period first. She tried to exceed everything that her sister when it was her turn to become a “woman”. At the time that she had her first menstruation period, she was rather sad than happy.  She thought about how being a woman could be so demanding.

                The title, It’s A Mens World, isn’t a grammatical error but a play on the plural form for man and the colloquial term for menstruation. Other than her first “mens” that the author discussed in her first essay, she also discussed the men in her life. She recalled her first crush also in the first essay; she talked about how her father has influenced her view of her mother in the essay “Milkshakes and Daddies”.  She dedicated an entire essay to an uncle that she admires in “Super Inggo”. The essay “Sa Aking Uncle Boy” is dedicated to another uncle.

                She shared a lot of anecdotes about her childhood. She enjoyed being a child despite the marital conflict between her parents. Her parents’ separation led her father to “kidnap” her and her younger sister. She grew up surrounded by Chinese relatives in her father side but after her father’s death, she and her sister were forced to move to her mother who was then living with another man with their own children.

                Her recollections of her childhood were not all happy. In the essay “Sa Ganitong Paraan daw Namatay si Kuya Dims”, she honestly recounted an experience of molestation done by an older cousin back when she was nine years old. It was only in high school that she realized that the act done by her cousin was wrong. From the time that she knew what sexual harassment is, until the death of the person who has afflicted her with such traumatic memory, she felt ashamed of herself and was never confident in front of any other woman. It was only upon hearing the death of that person was she able to feel relief.

                Each one of us would have a different perspective of our society according to our experiences and according to the environment where we grew up. The author’s anecdotes about her life clearly reflect this diversity of a woman’s experiences from that of a man. A man can never experience the anguish of a girl’s first menstruation and never can a man experience of giving birth to a child that she would have to bring up alone. Apart from the author's own life she also shared bits of stories of her mother and her sister, thus the different perspectives of women, according to the roles they play.  

                Reading the book made me feel like the author’s close friend. She wrote it so candidly and very straightforward just as how a friend tells a story on an ordinary conversation. Her essays are so honest, very transparent that you would feel what she could have probably felt on the situation being told. With her description of her life, growing up in a poor family, you’ll know where her sarcasm and humor are coming from. Being a teenager on her way to becoming a woman, I could relate to some of her anecdotes and I enjoyed how she expressed her wit throughout the book.

               I recommend this book, not just for young adults but to other people as well. Young people like me could pick up life stories from the anecdotes that will be helpful as we go through life. Girls could relate to a lot of her stories and they will learn a lot from this book. I also recommend this to boys for they too could affect a girl’s life whether in a positive or in a negative way, as reflected in some of the author’s essays. Women will not only be women in their young age but they are women all throughout their life. Through this book, men, especially fathers will see the impact of how they bring up their daughters. The book is indeed easy to understand for it is written in Filipino, decorated by a lot of colloquial terms; some are unfamiliar to me, but nevertheless, they add up to the humor. The book may seem light but it would make you think about how you are going about your present life. This book deserves four stars!